Nothing's ever easy, particularly where government agencies are concerned. Today has been a bureaucratic nightmare across the board. We went to the Council offices to register the barn. The very affable receptionist sent me through to the One Stop Shop (no joke, that's what it's called) in the planning department . Having waited for about 10 minutes I finally got the Tracey of the dept. I told her, very politely as you'd expect, what I was there for but it was a little difficult for her to assist so she swivelled her chair and said,
"Did ya get that, Shar?"
"Wha?"
"Lady's building 2 barns and needs an address for them,"
I interjected, "No, actually, we are converting a barn into 2 dwellings and need to register addresses for council tax etc."
"You need to see Planning Officer - go and sit at a round table and she'll see you in a bit. Oh, they're all full, sit over there....."
So I sat, and sat, and sat and then Shar said, "Have you filled a form in?". Well, I hadn't as I hadn't been advised to. So I did and then sat and sat and sat some more. Fif came in from parking the car and bumping into the vicar (not with the car). Gave her the heads up then we sat and people watched and sat and people watched and listened in wonderment as Shar revelled in giving people her interpretation of planning requirements. And still we sat until she suddenly shouted over, "What did you want? Oh no, you don't want to see the Planning Officer - who told you that?"
"Erm you did,"
"Didn't,"
"Yes you did, Shar," piped up Tracey.
"Well you mustn't have explained yourself proper. What you need to do is write to Glenys."
"Who the flying doughnut is Glenys?"
And so we wrote our request, each word prompted by Shar, on the scrap of paper she proffered from her notebook. Can't wait to hear what Glenys has to say......
When we got home there was a letter waiting from the Job Centre requesting a Form SSP1 to support my application for Incapable Benefit. And so to the telephone:
- I've already sent Form SSP1 in order to begin the process - that's how you got my information.
- Ah, yes, but you sent it to the wrong place.
- But I sent it in the supplied envelope.
- Well that was to the wrong address.
- But you gave me that envelope.
- Well that's as may be but it's to the wrong address - you'll need to send it again.
- But I haven't got it any more, you have.
- Well so you say but it's not at the right place so you'll have to do it again.
Where's the nearest brick wall?
"Did ya get that, Shar?"
"Wha?"
"Lady's building 2 barns and needs an address for them,"
I interjected, "No, actually, we are converting a barn into 2 dwellings and need to register addresses for council tax etc."
"You need to see Planning Officer - go and sit at a round table and she'll see you in a bit. Oh, they're all full, sit over there....."
So I sat, and sat, and sat and then Shar said, "Have you filled a form in?". Well, I hadn't as I hadn't been advised to. So I did and then sat and sat and sat some more. Fif came in from parking the car and bumping into the vicar (not with the car). Gave her the heads up then we sat and people watched and sat and people watched and listened in wonderment as Shar revelled in giving people her interpretation of planning requirements. And still we sat until she suddenly shouted over, "What did you want? Oh no, you don't want to see the Planning Officer - who told you that?"
"Erm you did,"
"Didn't,"
"Yes you did, Shar," piped up Tracey.
"Well you mustn't have explained yourself proper. What you need to do is write to Glenys."
"Who the flying doughnut is Glenys?"
And so we wrote our request, each word prompted by Shar, on the scrap of paper she proffered from her notebook. Can't wait to hear what Glenys has to say......
When we got home there was a letter waiting from the Job Centre requesting a Form SSP1 to support my application for Incapable Benefit. And so to the telephone:
- I've already sent Form SSP1 in order to begin the process - that's how you got my information.
- Ah, yes, but you sent it to the wrong place.
- But I sent it in the supplied envelope.
- Well that was to the wrong address.
- But you gave me that envelope.
- Well that's as may be but it's to the wrong address - you'll need to send it again.
- But I haven't got it any more, you have.
- Well so you say but it's not at the right place so you'll have to do it again.
And so it went on until my head could stand it no more. People who manage to cheat the system must be genii and, in my view, almost deserve their ill-gotten gains for their dedication, patience and stoicism. Anyway, thanks, Lynda, for keeping a copy of the dreaded SSP1 and rescuing me from this nightmare..... 
And finally - Doc Simon has referred me to a psychiatrist who will then refer me to the particular psychologist that Doc S feels will be most beneficial for me but BUPA says I can't unless I'm referred to him by a psychiatrist. Yesterday I phoned the psychiatrist that Doc Simon had written to on BUPA's recommendation, left a message, and she phoned me back today to say:
a) she's on maternity leave but she may see me once she reads Doc Simon's letter which she's not done yet as she's on maternity leave
and
b) she may not be able to see me as she's the kind of psychiatrist that can only be seen when patients are referred to her by another psychiatrist.....
a) she's on maternity leave but she may see me once she reads Doc Simon's letter which she's not done yet as she's on maternity leave
and
b) she may not be able to see me as she's the kind of psychiatrist that can only be seen when patients are referred to her by another psychiatrist.....
Where's the nearest brick wall?
2 comments:
Incapacity Benefit application .... I remember it well ... I had exactly the same problem as yourself and when I did manage to finally send all of the correct paperwork back to the correct job centre ... which took about six weeks and numerous telephone calls to them...they took another 3 months to tell me that I wasn't entitled to a bloody bean. Hope that you have better luck than I did!
Don't worry about psychiatrists. I've seen lots of them. A bit like Churchill said about an enigma in a mystery or a mystery in an enigma or some such. Perhaps they're a good introduction to modern literature. Blog yourself to victory? (I just don't like digging.)
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